Sh!t My Dad Wears

By Alex Chronopoulos

He’s always got on his suit and tie, but certainly never leaves anything on the floor. Meet my dad, whose OCD propels him to match his belt with his socks, shoes and watch strap, and ensure that our house is always pristinely vacuumed.

My dad is one of those men who have an outfit for everything. In fact, he’s probably worse than me.

He has his work outfits, his home outfits, his working-in-the-yard outfit, his going-on-vacation-and-it’s-a-long-flight outfit, his home-sick outfit, his going-to-the-movies outfit, his embarrass-my-daughter outfit; the list literally exceeds the number of sweater-and-collar-shirt options he has.

It’s like he has some sort of sixth sense that can predict the weather and the day’s events so that he always knows what to wear. He plays it off as having “been around the block a few times” (which I probably don’t want to know the meaning of), but it’s unnerving.

I remembering being a little kid and watching my dad get ready for work. He’d wake up at exactly 6:30 a.m., shower and then proceed to get dressed. He’d start with his socks, left one first then right, he’d put on a shirt and button it from top to bottom, then pants, left leg then right, tuck the shirt in, add a belt (which matched his socks and eventually his shoes—usually black or brown) and then either a tie, sweater or blazer depending on the occasion.

 

This was the highlight of my day because I found it so hilarious how seriously he took it. He truly embodied the art of getting dressed. I also found it pretty amusing to hide one of his socks when he wasn’t looking or telling him that he had a piece of lint on his shoulder. The look of sheer panic was priceless and I’d proceed to reenact it to my friends in the schoolyard.

The ironic part is that fashion isn’t a part of his vocabulary. My dad blatantly refuses to shop because he simply can’t be bothered. “That’s why I invest in certain pieces that will last me a lifetime,” he says. And it’s true—some of the stuff in his closet is indeed from a lifetime ago…the 1980s, i.e. the Hawaiian shirt and quite a few pairs of Levi’s jeans (kept in pristine condition, mind you).

But it wasn’t always this way. He used to be quite the fashion aficionado in the ‘80s, choosing to wear exclusively Lacoste, Ralph Lauren and Jordache. Looking back, he cringes in disgust. “I like to think I’m more sensible now…and less tacky,” he says. But whose fashion choices from years past aren’t tacky and cringe-worthy?

It’s in recent years that I’ve begun to appreciate my dad’s approach to fashion. While I still marvel at the here and now of H&M windows or the latest feature item on Net-a-Porter, I find it so much more satisfying investing in fewer, better pieces that work seamlessly into your existing wardrobe. While I definitely don’t possess the same level of restraint that my dad has when it comes to not buying the first ten things I see in a store, it’s slowly getting better. Whilst I stray towards skirts and dresses for everyday wear (as anyone who knows me will tell you, yes, even in -30 C weather), I like mixing in more masculine pieces like a blazer or collared shirt to keep things interesting. Growing up with parents on opposite sides of the fashion spectrum—a dad who’s minimalist and a mother who loves colour and “pops” of anything—it’s been a challenge carving out my own style.

Like his style itself, the inspiration behind it has evolved over the years. In the beginning, “I had a sort of Jekyll and Hyde complex,” he says. Meaning, he had different looks for different sets of friends—his biker friends demanded a tougher approach to fashion, so his look revolved around Levi’s and leather. His “prep” friends, on the other hand, saw a more relaxed look of Brooks Brothers and Sperry’s.

His look changed with his first job and he was required to wear a three-piece suit—but he explains that it was the ‘80s, so everyone from a used car salesman to, indeed, an aerospace engineer followed suit. He recalls his first suit purchase as a “three for the price of one” deal from Harry Rosen (unheard of today…but as previously mentioned, this was the ‘80s). So he had his pick of brown, charcoal or navy, with pinstripes no less.

Currently, he has become more casual because he “no longer has anyone to impress,” he says. Lately, you can find him listening to Cole Porter and going for a self-proclaimed “bohemian” look. But if you ask me, the last time I checked, la vie bohéme didn’t require one’s belt to match their shoes. But I suppose old habits die hard.

His style today is more relaxed and toned-down, preferring neutral colours and clean lines. He isn’t in with what’s hip; unbeknownst to “Solange-ay Knowles” and “I don’t know a P!nk, but I know a Deep Purple,” he’s in with what’s classic. Aside from ensuring that no hair is out of place or crease un-creased, my dad truly appreciates the technicality of fashion and the satisfaction that comes with wearing clothes that effortlessly go together. I don’t see him as being “stylish” per se, because he isn’t one to go out with a trendy suit and crazy cockroach-killer shoes (anymore), but he’s definitely an inspiration. One added benefit is his extensive sweater collection, which has it’s own cupboard and is colour coordinated. It’s better than any Value Village collection.

“I’m like the male version of Annie Hall…so really just a regular guy,” he says, “but make sure I don’t look fat in the photos, and pick that lint off my jacket!”

So Happy Father’s Day to the craziest, vacuum-cleaning, sweater-matching, best guy I know.

N.B. Sam and her dad are currently in Ethiopia, so she was unable to contribute to this post. But look out for her travel stories and photos coming soon. And also, check out her weekly posts on CollegeFashionista!

Until next time,

The RK.